Mom: Waiter Friend is going to take us on a ghost hunt tomorrow night when everyone else is asleep!
Mom: It's going to be so much fun!
Me: Mom, that's totally creepy.
Mom: Oh, it'll be fun. I just hope no one finds out, because Waiter Friend could lose his job. No one is supposed to be down in the tunnels underneath the hotel.
Me: The TUNNELS? Think about this for a second. The place is a jillion years old. They originally wanted to film THE SHINING there. And you know how creepy it can be at night!
Mom: Sure, I guess!
Me: No, not during the day when dad's golfing and you're at a culinary demonstration learning how to make freakin' creme brulee. I'm talking LATE AT NIGHT. It's creepy. I get creeped out just being alone in my room there sometimes.
Mom: Waiter Friend has a list of all the ghosts that are supposed to still be in the hotel. He calls them The Guests Who Haven't Checked Out Yet.
Me: Don't look at any portraits for too long! They always come to life!
Mom: Oh, you're silly.
Me: I swear, if you disappear, I am NOT coming after you with a psychic and night vision goggles.
Mom: I can't wait! We're going to see a ghost!
Me: Is your will updated?