if some guy sees you when you're sleeping and knows when you're awake, maybe close the blinds

You know it's Christmas when the joy and spirit of the season touches us all. Or when one of your relatives says dead seriously about one of your other relatives, "I'm sure I have some crap in the basement I can give her." Or when one of my students sings Jingle Bells in its entirety without taking a breath and then bursts into tears. Santa is like crack to 6-year-olds.

Or maybe you know it's officially the holidays when your sneak attack lyric contest at work, which has laid dormant for months, is reborn for the sake of Christmas songs. One of my esteemed colleagues was thisclose to winning when he asked me, "Do you hear what I hear?" It would have been his finest moment, tripping me up by using an actual song TITLE (you get extra points for that) but his delivery was a little too sing-songy and I suddenly remembered something about a star, a star, way up in the sky, little lamb. Not bad for a girl who dropped out of Sunday School when she was seven. But honestly, I can't lose my champion status because I accidentally agree with someone that the weather outside is frightful. Needless to say, tis the season to watch your step.

The only thing that sucks is that this time around some lamer people at work have caught on and are all like, "HEY RED, ARE YOU ROCKIN' AROUND THE CHRISTMAS TREE?" That's subtle, jackass. So glad you joined the game.

In any case, a very merry Whatever It Is You're Into to all, and to all a goodnight.