clearly on a Q&A kick

Swiped without a second thought from the incomparable Jacynth.

1. If you could live in another era, what would it be?
Probably the 60s, for the music and all the changing landscapes and the free-flowing drugs.

2. If you got paid $200 million per year, would you be an Alaskan crab fisher (keep in mind this is one of the deadliest jobs)?
I've never heard of this job, so maybe I don't find it appropriately terrifying. Could I be an apprentice crabber for a year, get the $200 million, and then go back to my regular life?

3. Did you eat glue as a child?
No, but I immensely enjoyed peeling it off my fingers once it dried. I'm sure that's a whole other personality disorder.

4. If you could be in a movie, what would it be and why?
I could be all Clooney about this, but in reality I'd probably love for it to be some smartass teenage thing. I enjoy pop culture far too much (I just bought Peter a book called TTYL and the entire thing is online chats between squabbling high school girls) not to submerge myself in it, if presented with the opportunity. And I'm not talking about something like Scary Movie, for the love of God. Can we talk for a minute about how sad movies like that are when they're not even in on the joke they're trying to spoof... how did misguided parodies become a new genre? I'm thinking more Clueless: "What happened? Did my hair get flat?"

5. If you could set up your own mafia ring, what would you call it?
My mafia ring doesn't need a catchy name. Now bring me that bitch's head on a stick. I'm the godmother, in case that wasn't clear. (Flipping the gender makes that title sound not at all tough.)

6. If you had the choice between meeting David Hasselhoff or Tom Cruise, who would you choose and why?
Tom Cruise. I'd tell him I'm really confused about life and I feel like I need guidance and vitamins. Whatever ensued would be funny.

7. Would you ever fly Hooters airlines?
Sure, if they're cheap.

8. Would you rather hear no evil or see no evil?
Is there a no evil whatsoever option on the table?

9. If you started a search engine, what would you name it?
yourealizeyourekindofastalker.com

10. If you had the ability to see five years into the future, would you do it?
No, but it sure would've helped The Bride*, huh?

*Full story forthcoming.