Monday, October 02, 2006

29

On this day in 1535, Jacques Cartier discovered Montreal, Canada. In 1935, Italy invaded Ethiopia (here's hoping they left a meatball or two behind). In 1958, Guinea declared itself independent from France. Where's Guinea? Maybe you should've rode those coattails a little longer for PR purposes, my friends. Or maybe I should look at a map. Man, I love the random trivia that Wikipedia brings into our lives.

Anyway, my whole pointless point is that on this day in 1977, my always understated, extremely softspoken mother was experiencing the tail end of "NINE months with my head in a toilet, THIRTEEN hours in labor, for THIS." (But, of course, because of her slight Boston accent: "Fah THIS.") I heard these words approximately 15 jillion times growing up, my very own tailor-made Irish-Catholic guilt trip, usually accompanied by some sort of sweeping hand gesture to represent the unspeakable madness that I'd brought into her life by not cleaning my room/not studying for a math test/not calling and telling her where I was when I KNOW how she worries.

On kind of a whim, I sent her flowers, to be delivered today. I know it's my birthday and all, but I did break her coccyx bone with my giant head almost thirty years ago. And nothing says "hey, sorry for destroying your ass" like a lovely arrangement from Winston's.

Plus, you have to be The Nicest Person on the Freakin' Planet to send someone else flowers on your birthday, right? If I weren't already an only child, this would've just upped my inheritance big time. I would've scored the Cape house AND my dad's floating magnetic pen. That crazy thing is suspended in midair!

Anyway, the weekend was good (it feels weird to write that because I feel like I don't usually do weekend updates here, but it's my birthday so everything I say is interesting). Went to what was officially my last game of the season at Fenway on Friday night with not-a-midget Mark, who turned out to be a remarkably good date... great seats, bought me beer, and insisted on giving me his jacket when I was cold. I've decided to exclusively date family and friends from now on for these perks. Saturday afternoon, which was delicious in its autumnness, I met up with my friend Doug and his lovely new girlfriend Tina in Somerville for lunch, and afterwards we happened upon the fluff festival. It seems that fluff (yes, of the marshmallow variety) was invented right there in Union Square. Who knew? Spent Saturday night with four fantastical friends, best known to you as the first four links over there on the right. Sunday night, dinner at Sonsie with the people who created me. And tonight, dinner with the Jens, both Party and Elusive... which I guess means it'll be a great time that's hard to locate. I'm birthdayed out and loving it.

Also, I knew it was time to age a year because I like to be on the cutting edge of the blogosphere (i.e. the blutting bledge) and really, how trendy are birthdays getting? "Oh, it's kind of a blirthday thing. I guess you wouldn't understand." [fake smile]

Incidentally, here are some other people who got all borned today: Sting, Gandhi, Tiffany, and my beloved former roommate Ryan. I've only had the opportunity to sing "ber ner ner ner ner ner, you say it's your birthday, ber ner ner ner ner ner, it's my birthday too, yeah" to the last person on that list, but believe you me, if I ever cross paths with the Tiffster, she's getting an earful. Gandhi too, but first he's getting a sandwich.

19 comments:

Jaek said...

I would like to welcome you to the threshhold of thirty.

Now that you're older and wiser, you can dispense even more sage wisdom, now with extra sage.

Happy Birthday, Red!

stefanie said...

Happy Birthday! I feel so off the blutting bledge because my birthday isn't until March. I share mine with Queen Latifah, incidentally. I'm not sure if that's more or less exciting than the Ghandi/Tiffany combo.

Also, my mom sends flowers to her mother on her own birthday every year. She's pointed this out to me no less than 17 times, which I'm starting to think is supposed to be some sort of hint. Clearly you are a better daughter than I, as I've never taken the hint and done the same thing myself.

dave said...

I wish you the happiest of birthdays! And many, many more! The world needs as much as Red as it can get!..or maybe thats just me.

Darren McLikeshimself said...

YAY! Happy birthday, Red!

nabbalicious said...

Happy birthday! Being 29 was weird for me, because for that whole year whenever anyone asked my age, I felt like I was lying about it.

"Blutting bledge"?! Hahaha...

PoBaL said...

Wow, Tiffany! I'm jealous; all I've got is Helen Keller.
Oh, and Happy Blirthday!

randomstuff said...

Happy Birthday. I turned 29 on Saturday, so I share my b-day with Truman Capote. And when people ask me how old I am and I say 29, they ask me "for the first time?"

Killer said...

Posting a blog on your B day is like walking around telling everyone, "it's my b day." Everyone then says, "Oh, happy birthday!" But they don't really mean it, and they now wonder if they were supposed to chip in for a gift or sign some card floating around the office.
Happy Birthday!
Was there a card floating around the blogosphere I was supposed to sign?

maliavale said...

Happy 29th berfday, the age you'll be for the rest of your life. Whee!

othur-me said...

Happy Birthday!

Killer - I still have the card. Waiting for you to sign it. But if you prefer, we can split the cash everyone contributed and go get some beers.

othur-me said...

Happy Birthday!

Killer - I still have the card. Waiting for you to sign it. But if you prefer, we can split the cash everyone contributed and go get some beers.

chillier said...

I can't wait to see what MiMaw is going to have to say about this...

Happy Birthday you cutie pie!

Guinness_Girl said...

I certainly hope someone sings you the Olive Garden birthday song today. I ate there so much in high school that I once knew all the words. "From the pasta we make to the lasagna we bake - doo doo doo dooh! - wishing YOU a happy birthday!"

Er, yeah. HAPPY BIRTHDAY RED!!!

Oh, and since I'm sure you're dying to know, I share my birthday with Alfred Hitchcock and Fidel Castro. A bunch of weirdos (myself included) were born on Aug. 13, apparently.

Melissa said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Melissa said...

Augh. Comment was:

"Blappy blirthday, blou Blig Blat Blunt!"

Miss Fire said...

Happy Birthday to my most favorite blogger!

don't call me MA'AM said...

Yay! Celebrate your youth!!! Hope you have a great birthday, and I'll sign that card whenever it comes my way. I will also tape a piece of Fruit Stripe gum to the card, because that's what makes it even more special!

Joe said...

Happy birthday! I am glad we got to see you Saturday night, and that we got to watch some of Dane on SNL together.

And I share my birthday with Jennifer Love Hewitt. And I was born exactly one day before Drew Barrymore. How cool am I?

Red said...

Thanks guys! And Killer: totally. I always think it's funny when it's some random work person's birthday, and you have to sign a card, and everyone has written "Have a great one! Bob" and "Enjoy your day! Erin" because you don't know what to say but it's not like you can refuse the card.