Sunday, March 25, 2007

Get Outta My Dreams, Get Into My Car

I had some really messed up dreams on Friday night, like CSI crime scene grisly. So I did some googling (don't judge me, I'm a pursuer of subconscious knowledge!) and Sleeps.com told me "For years in our family [dreaming about death] has meant that someone in the family would soon be wed and the wedding would be beautiful." What wedding isn't beautiful? Weddings mean free dinner, chardonnay, dancing and cake.

Wait a second. On Friday night, Jen came over and copied a bunch of songs off my iTunes. She had a free dinner (I cooked), we drank chardonnay, at one point I put on a crappy bridesmaid dress from a wedding that we were both in a couple years ago and danced around to the music (I'm, uh, going to have to request no judgment from you again), AND we ate cake-flavored ice cream (Edy's Slow Churned Take The Cake, which has frosting and sprinkles in it and is nothing short of a religious experience. It's the best thing ever and it's low in points. AND it's an official blog dessert blessert because it came into my life on Nabbalicious's recommendation. The funniest thing is that it's a part of Edy's American Idol series. Five flavors are vying to be part of their regular line-up, people vote for their favorite one and the losers just go away. Faced with that terrifying possibility, Jen and I actually went to the damn Edy's website to make sure Take the Cake is winning. Thankfully, it is. Vote or die, people.)

Ahem. Sleeps.com also believes that death in a dream can mean "a birth, the opposite of death." Did they just define birth for me? And if you think about it, when you're single, a birth kind of would be a death: death of dating prospects, social life, and bank account. And, interestingly, your ability to sleep at night. Am I overthinking this?

Then on Saturday night I dreamed that someone I love died (don't worry, it wasn't you). Ack. Short of making tearful phone calls at 5 AM, I turned to Sleeps, now my old faithful, later that morning. But then I noticed that it said that dreaming of a fork in the road means you'll soon have to make a decision and dreaming about macaroni means that you're in for various small losses. Uh-huh. We're breaking up, Sleeps.

I turn to Lifetimetv.com, surprisingly serious on the matter considering all they do is air reruns of Designing Women or movies about your seemingly nice neighbor turning out to be a serial killer who is holding the mailman and your tenth grade boyfriend hostage and whatever you end up doing about it, at some point it will involve running down a suburban tree-lined street in the middle of the night, your heart racing and button-down shirt askew.

The intuitive minds at Lifetimetv.com say that "In the Universal Language of Mind, death signifies a change from one state of being to another" (I'm always suspicious of superfluous capitalization) and that I should "Identify the change that has occurred in your life. This will be the heart of your dream message. Who or what has died in your dream will lend insight into the nature of the change you have experienced, and will assist in responding to this change joyfully instead of fearfully. Keep in mind the change symbolized by death in a dream can be followed by a resurrection of your consciousness. Reach for this elevated awareness." Thanks for the fortune cookie, but where's my crab rangoon?

Then I thought about how well my own dream decoding worked on Friday and decided to deconstruct my Saturday night: Dorie's kitchen, more wine... but a different brand than Friday. Is that the change they're referring to? I did respond to it joyfully, instead of fearfully, and I believe it did bring about an elevated awareness: richer friends buy more expensive wine.

12 comments:

kate said...

"Thanks for the fortune cookie, but where's my crab rangoon?" Is my new slogan, favorite T-shirt and the calling card of my new religion. Come join me.

nabbalicious said...

Oooh, I am glad you've gone out and tried Take the Cake! Now, may I recommend two more blesserts? Choc n' Roll Caramel (also part of that series) AND Edy's Loaded Butterfinger. The Loaded ones don't say they're low-fat anywhere than I can see, but the Butterfinger is only 3 pts for a half cup!

Liz said...

I keep looking for Ben and Jerry's Americone Dream, their Stephen Colbert tribute ice cream. I can't find it anywhere, which is good, because I also can't button the capri pants I bought last summer!

gorillabuns said...

we are lovers of the choc n'roll carmel edition as well.

yes, i think the birth of things to come is the discovery a new and excellent wine. hopefully, the sign is not the occassion to have to wear another god awful bridesmaid's dress (a.k.a another wedding to attend) because no matter what they say, you will not be able to wear these green and plum concoctions to your next cocktail party.

Killer said...

All of those dream interpretations sound completely made up. I think I will write my own dream interpretation book.

A brutal dream with gore and violence is trying to tell you not to mix wine and icecream before going to bed.

Lola said...

OMG, Loaded Butterfinger? I'm all over that. Although, what could that mean?

Darren McLikeshimself said...

What does it mean when you keep dreaming that your teeth are falling out?

stefanie said...

Wait a minute. Lifetime's web site does dream analysis? Why??

Also, you have perfectly summed up how I feel about the prospect of having a child right now (death of dating prospects, social life, bank account, and sleep). I'm just going to keep on hitting that snooze button on my biological clock, thank you very much.

NancyPearlWannabe said...

When in doubt, I always turn to the ultimate guide: DeGrassi Junior High. Old school version. Those Canadians always know what's up.

Oh, and that ice cream? Uhh, yum.

i like cheese said...

It is a sad statement about my life that I am walking away from your latest post with one and only one thought. MUST find Take the Cake ice cream, STAT.

metalia said...

Oh my lord, these myriad ice cream flavors all sound ridiculously good.

Also, I may or may not own a dream dictionary, so I can completely relate to your dream googling.

Red said...

Kate, thought you'd like that one.

Nabbs, ooh, thanks!

Liz, haven't heard of that one, but it sounds funny.

Gorilla, I'll drink to that.

Killer, ha, you're probably right.

Lo, no comment (ironically).

Darren, maybe it means you put too much hot sauce on your food and your teeth are begging for mercy?

Cheese, if that's all you walk away with, I'm happy! Go get it NOW.

Metalia, hee, glad I'm not alone.

Stef, I will also drink to THAT.